To celebrate the start of 2023, we’ve been having a bit of a New Year theme happening here on the podcast. We’ve discussed creating sustainable success with your resolutions and being courageous moving forward, so if you’re looking ahead at the goals you want to achieve, changes you want to make in your practice, or transformations in your personal life, I’ve got you.

 

Whatever you choose to set your heart on this year, the reality is that you are going to need to make some difficult decisions. Whether it’s a decision you have to make in your practice, a new direction you want to go in for your career, or a decision you’re making about a personal relationship, the purpose of today’s episode is to provide some strategies to help you along.

 

The New Year signifies a clean slate for us to create whatever we want. You have 365 days to decide what you would love to have in 2023, what would feel magical to you, and how you’re going to embody the person you want to become. 

 

Whether your goals for 2023 are to become more productive, to branch into a new practice area, feel more in control of your time, set boundaries with confidence, or push your health up the priority list, all of it requires courage. And this week, I’m showing you the vital role courage plays in moving you forward, and how to embark on a journey of becoming courageous. 

 

New Year’s resolutions are an opportunity to set lofty goals that inspire and move us forward, but they’re also an opportunity for us to set goals that leave us feeling like we’ve fallen short. So, if you have a goal that you find yourself resolving to create year after year that you keep giving up on, you’re in the right place.

 

Although the New Year’s resolution frenzy provides a clean slate go to after new and exciting goals, there’s a chance you may also setting yourself up for failure and making it harder than it needs to be. So this year, instead of setting wild and unrealistic expectations of what you can accomplish, I’m showing you how to reinvent the way you set and achieve your resolutions. 

 

The law profession can often feel like a pressure cooker. There are systemic pressures and very high standards that exist, which make anxiety, burnout, and stress a common experience among lawyers. And without the right tools or support, carrying that weight of responsibility is extremely challenging. 

 

This week, I’m speaking to two very special guests, Melanie Goela and Ellen Schlesinger. Melanie and Ellen are lawyers turned counsellors and founders of From Anxiety to Ease, an organization dedicated to supporting and promoting the mental health and wellbeing of lawyers. The biggest issue lawyers present them with is anxiety, and they’re here to show you why anxiety is a normal human experience, and how it’s never too early to seek help.

 

How have you used the skill of delayed gratification to get to where you are today? Maybe it was social invitations you turned down to study, or going to law school so you can put off the gratification of having a well-compensated job you love. There are probably many examples in your life where you’ve practiced delayed gratification to have a larger payoff in the future.

 

Delayed gratification has been the subject of a number of studies, and we’ve seen evidence of a correlation between it and success. Practicing this skill might give you a rush as you achieve goal after goal, and you might justify making sacrifices at your own expense. However, you can become so good at delayed gratification that you end up having no gratification at all.

 

Many of us, especially as women, were never taught how to have power. We discount our power in small ways every day, and if you work in a primarily male organization or industry, you may not have people in positions of power who look or act like you to serve as a great model to emulate.

 

Power isn’t something we talk about enough, and for most of us, we haven’t consciously defined our relationship with it. Whether you describe your relationship with power as awkward or non-existent, or whether you have a healthy relationship with it, no matter where you fall on the spectrum, a little bit of discussion goes a long way.

 

‘Problems you solve versus problems you manage’ is a concept that was developed by relationship expert, John Gottman. It was an eye-opener to me when I first learned that some problems are not always resolvable, and that that in itself is not a problem. But if we don’t need to solve problems, then what?

 

While problems are an inherent part of life and we can’t ever escape them, what you may not know is that some problems are unsolvable. Trying to solve them is only leading to you spending time and energy trying to fix something that doesn’t actually need to be fixed, when you could manage them instead. And this is the game-changing concept I’m sharing with you today.

 

This week, I’m interviewing a special guest: lawyer turned counsellor Bena Stock. She’s here to talk to us about emotional regulation, and provide practical tips and strategies that you can start using right now when you find yourself facing difficult emotions, whether that’s at work, at home, or anywhere else.

 

As a former lawyer, Bena knows how overwhelming it can feel to juggle law and life, and she believes firmly in putting yourself first. Bena was one of the first people I reached out to when initially deciding on my own career as a lawyer, so I know personally how amazing she is, and I know all of you listening will benefit from hearing her and how she frames emotional regulation.

 

Choosing the right words, whether you’re writing, speaking, or interviewing has the ability to paint a mental picture and bring the person you’re with into another world. When you’re trying to effectively and powerfully reach someone you’re communicating with, the language you use matters, and my guest this week is an expert on all things words and communication. 

 

Stephanie Mitchell is a law school and journalism graduate who is now a writing coach, consultant, and professional keynote speaker. She specializes in words by helping people communicate clearly, persuasively, and passionately, and she’s here to emphasize the importance of being mindful of the words we choose to express ourselves so we can better connect with those around us. 

 

Let’s talk about your priorities. I’ve noticed many of my clients, and even myself at times, struggle to figure out what to say yes to, and what to say no to. We have a full plate, and everything seems to cry out to us at an equal volume.

 

Between the demands of work and the stresses of our personal lives, things just keep coming our way. This leads to feelings of overwhelm, like life is just coming at you and you’re constantly being reactive instead of proactive. If you can relate to this experience, it’s time to take a look at your priorities so we can create a little more ease and structure in your life.